We Are Going to Have a Baby!
As most of you know Scott and I have debated whether we wanted to have children or not. At first we were on the 5 year plan. It seemed as if we blinked twice and year 5 was upon us so we reevaluated our plan and decided on 10 years. At that point we would adopt an older kid.
Our plans are not His plans. On January 10 2011 I found out I was pregnant. It was obviously a huge surprise because we were trying to prevent getting pregnant. Im not going to go into details but the timing for this child couldn’t have been any better. God obviously knew what He was doing by creating this life in me. I can look back now and say its Gods perfect timing and we desperately needed it. I praise God that He is wiser than me and has our best interest in mind.
Its amazing how quickly your feelings change about children when you find out you are having one of your own. I went from complete and utter shock to joyfulness. I immediately had a overwhelming feeling of wanting to protect and nurture this child growing in me. I would be devastated if something happened to it and would probably try for another one.
The way I found out I was with child is not the fairy tale story I always imagined. Its the complete opposite:
It was January 10th and I woke up to a disaster. My email and Facebook had been hacked during the middle of the night. The hacker erased everything in my email including my contacts, which in turn erased all the numbers in my phone. I spent 5 hours trying to recover the information and change my passwords to all my online accounts. To make matters worse, Scott had left for Oklahoma the day before and wouldn’t be back till Thursday night. I was all alone trying to deal with the mess that the hacker left. I was suppost to be at work at 10 but my boss was understanding and allowed me to come in late after I had delt with the mess I was in.
In the back of my mind that entire morning was the fact that I should have started my period a few days ago (if my calculations were correct). I had been late plenty of times before. I would always take a test, see the negative line, breathe a sign of relief and patiently wait till mother nature finally decided to show up.
I needed one less thing to worry about that day so on my way to work I ran by Walgreens and grabbed a test. I knew there was no way on earth I could be pregnant, and I just needed to see the negative line to put my mind at ease so I could focus at work.
I waltzed into work 3 hours late and immediately headed for the bathroom, stick in hand. I did my thing, washed my hands and then looked at it. OH MY GOSH! No, dear Lord this has got be a mistake!! I went into a mild panic state and said rather loudly, “Are you freaking kidding me?!”
I stormed out of the bathroom in a zombie like trance and made a bee line for my car. My boss tried talking to me on my way out, but I blew him off and mumbled something unintelligent about being back soon. As soon as I got in the car I started sobbing and hyperventilating. I immediately called Scott in Oklahoma and broke the news to him. His first response was, “Erica, breath!” We were both in shock, but he quickly transitioned into husband mode and tried to talk me through it saying things like we are going to get through this. His words helped calm me down and soon I was able to think straight. I apologized for taking the test while he was in Oklahoma and explained that I didn’t actually think I was pregnant which is why I took it when I did. He tried to make earlier flight arrangements back to Jacksonville but nothing was available and he ended up having to stay till Thursday.
It was so hard having to keep the secret from my family all that week. I wanted to tell them, but also wanted to Scott to be there. Our reunion was one of the sweetest we had ever had. I jumped in his arms and we hugged for the longest time. We spent that night talking of the future and he would lean down randomly and kiss my belly and talk to our child. It was a memory I will cherish forever.
